To kick things off, Chris arrives at the mansion and tells the women to pack up because they're leaving the mansion and heading to...Cleveland. To say the women are underwhelmed would be a HUGE understatement. I think they kept thinking that Chris was going to say, "JK! We're going to Bali!"
Victoria F.'s One-on-One
Victoria shares she's afraid of heights and has a temper tantrum in the car at the idea of going sky diving. She pulls it together. Instead, Peter's taking her...wait for it...flying! At this point I'll be surprised if a date is NOT flying focused. After the flight, they go to an amusement park. Pete shares he wants an even number of kids because if you go to an amusement park with three kids, one would always be left out. I'm not really following his math assuming he goes with them. Also, fantastic reasoning for deciding the number of kids.
They transition to the concert portion of the date and the producers are really in rare form this season because it just so happens that Victoria used to date the musical act. It is awkward AF for Victoria and the singer. Peter is gushing about how great the singer is and the two guys exchange digits afterwards. Hahahaha. Victoria and the singer chat and it's uncomfortable. For some inexplicable reason Victoria is freaking out about telling Peter that she dated the singer. Oh, to be in your twenties and have that be your biggest problem. Or she's just a huge drama queen. Perhaps a bit of both.
For the evening portion of the date, Peter is wearing a sports coat, but his buttoned shirt is untucked and it's driving me nuts. Peter's ready to have Chase sing at his and Victoria's wedding. Victoria has this huge build up to sharing her past relationship with Peter, and Peter's clearly starting to get nervous. She tells him and Peter keeps asking, "the guy at the concert?" He's so befuddled. Victoria walks off crying. Peter looks shaken but I'm really confused as to why. This is clearly drama for drama.
Peter goes to find Victoria crying in the corner. She keeps apologizing although she has nothing to apologize for. This is the fault of Machiavellian producers. Peter tells her it's fine. Peter starts laughing at the whole thing. Victoria is wowed at how Peter didn't dump her on the spot, highlighting her low self-worth.
Group Date
Peter and the women meet up at the Cleveland Browns stadium, also known as the Factory of Sadness. The gang gets warmed up with some football drills and then they play a game against each other. Clearly Chris Harrison couldn't be bothered to go to Cleveland and Fred Willard probably can't fly in his frail condition, so two randos do the play-by-play. The other Victoria tells Peter she can't play because of her back (what happened to her back?). So they make out instead. No surprise, the game starts to get ugly. As far as I can tell, they count each touchdown as seven points, not six. The game ends in a tie and the women are pissed that everyone gets to go to the after party.
Shiann, the game MVP, is pissed that Victoria steals Peter right away at the after party. Has she ever seen this show? To add more drama, Alayah comes clomping into the date (it's clomping, the stairs are metal and she sounds like an elephant coming up the stairs) and interrupts Peter and Shiann. Shiann basically says it's up to Peter if he wants to talk to Alayah. Obviously he talks to Alayah.
First off, Alayah swears up and down that her and Victoria are friends, not strangers. Ever the confronter, Peter goes to talk to Victoria. Victoria essentially avoids answering any of Peter's questions through crying and saying all the things she wants to share with Peter. Peter of course, hugs her because he doesn't want her to cry. Savannah(?), who has gotten zero screen time, starts throwing Victoria under the bus to the other women and says she's phony. Victoria greets Alayah with a seemingly warm hug and the three of them sit down to figure things out. What is there to figure out? Because of the magic of the truly amazing editing that the production team is doing, Alayah now looks like the composed and rational one and Victoria is evasive at best. Peter could have pressed Victoria for more info because she's speaking in circles but he's a pussy so he doesn't. Peter is very, very confused and "terrified" that Victoria isn't who she think she is. I am also very, very confused because I don't know who is genuine and who isn't because the producers keep shifting things.
We see Peter pondering by a shark tank. Get it? It's a metaphor for the women. Never mind where they are that there are shark tanks around. The rest of the women are pissed that Alayah has derailed another Peter outing. Peter goes back to Alayah and says he was swayed by what all of the women were saying about her instead of going with his gut. Peter asks Alayah to come back to the show. And she says she'll come back if he promises to move on. It will be fantastic if Peter gives the date rose to Alayah. He does and the women are pissed. Peter can't get out there fast enough and if he keeps this up, he might have a mutiny on his hands.
Alayah pretends that she's watching the show live because she knows that Victoria went on a one-on-one with Peter and Victoria's ex sang to them, and she also knows that Kelsey is scheduled to have a one-on-one with Peter the next day. She was clearly fed this info.
Kelsey's One-on-One
Peter tells Kelsey that Alayah is back and she is of course understanding. Peter's glad that she didn't give him any grief about it. We're subjected to more dancing shots of Pete, this time attempting to do the polka. Despite the recent champagne-gate shenanigans, Peter raves to the camera about how low-drama Kelsey is.
At the evening portion of the date, we find out the root of Kelsey's self-esteem and men issues when she shares with Peter that she found the note her Kelsey's dad left for her mom telling the mom he was leaving her. Her mom hadn't even read the note yet. And then he ran off the Mexico, presumably with his girlfriend and she didn't see him for 12 years after that. Perhaps he was also running from the law? This last part was unclear. Peter of course inserts how much he admires single moms. Then Peter starts crying when he thinks of his mom and grandmother coming to Cuba by themselves and how they struggled. Because he isn't an asshole about her story, Kelsey is swooning.
Back at the hotel, Victoria confronts Alayah about how Alayah knew that Victoria's ex sang at her date. It's a pretty entertaining confrontation and also reminds me why you shouldn't drink red wine on reality TV because it stains your teeth.
Cocktail Party
Peter joins the women for the cocktail party and is ready to pull one of the Victorias aside when the women start to unleash on him and how they're sore from playing football and he had the nerve to give the rose to somebody that wasn't even on the date. Peter gives the fake apology where he says he's sorry if his actions offended them. Kidding. He gets defensive and says he's not perfect and he's sorry. Then he pulls Victoria aside and she says she doesn't want to talk because she's frustrated. Peter and I are confused and he says, "So, you don't want to talk?" But she says she does so he tries to hold her hand and she pulls a Melania Trump and pulls her hand away. Then she goes off on him and asks him why he even asked her about Alayah if he wasn't going to listen to her. As we saw during the group date, Victoria's version of the Alayah/Victoria friendship isn't adding up but she's trying to take back control of the narrative. And she has a creepy smile on her face as she's quietly yelling at Peter. She then mentions the interaction the other Victoria had with Alayah and when he asks for more info, she tells him to ask them. Peter is really getting outplayed by these women. It's not even a contest.
Next we see Peter and brunette Victoria talking and Victoria clearly didn't want any of the women to know that her ex was at her date so she didn't say anything but Alayah told everyone. Peter is overwhelmed by his decision to bring back Alayah. Next Sydney goes off on Peter and how he doesn't know anything about her because they've been dealing with Alayah drama, even though wasn't it Sydney that started this whole thing?
Peter and Alayah talk and Peter asks why all of the women hate her so much. Alayah is trying to squeeze tears out of her eyes but she can't get there. And that's where we leave things off.
Who are your top women?
Even though we haven't seen much of Hannah Ann, think she's still one of the top contenders. Same with the lawyer (Kelly?). I'd add Madison and blonde Victoria to that list too, although her cracks are starting to show a bit. Who are your top four?
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