After getting pulled aside AGAIN, Kenny goes back to confront Lee about his lies. Kenny is wasting his breath because Lee is enjoying the attack. Rachel finally comes back and starts a long speech about trust. Lee gets the heave ho and Kenny can stay for now but hasn't earned the rose quite yet. Kenny nods and pretends to accept this but you know full well he's pissed that he didn't get the rose in front of Lee. Lee tells Rachel that it's okay but she should know that when Kenny came back over he threatened Lee again. Rachel's having none of it and Lee is super fake saying goodbye to Rachel. If Kenny does get the rose tonight his days are still numbered. Kenny can't leave well enough alone and has to go talk to Lee AGAIN. Dude, leave it alone. You're not helping your situation and if I was Rachel I'd tell you to go home once you made it back to the helicopter. Or even better, I'd tell the pilot to take off without you. Rachel is rightly annoyed.
The guys at the house are of course psyched when Lee's bag is taken away. I don't know where Rachel and Kenny are now (her hotel room?) but she gets right into it with him on why he had to go back to talk to Lee. Goodness I love this woman. Kenny says he'll act differently with Rachel but she's not having it. I really want to like Kenny but boy can he be clueless. By some miracle he gets the rose. Count your blessings sir. And just like that the date is over, which seems a little sudden to me. And then Kenny is Face Timing with his daughter and starts crying again. How old is his daughter again? She's either an old soul or she's older than I thought. Maybe 8? Obviously Kenny doesn't get punched by Lee as the previews implied so we have yet to see who clocks Kenny.
Rose Ceremony
Josiah is delusional and thinks he's making it to the end. Stop overcompensating again. I hope Alex doesn't go because while I'm not sure he's the brightest bulb, he's hot and has the best outfits. I don't know how many guys aren't getting roses tonight but my money's on Adam and the other guy whose name I don't know. One of the white guys. Is it me or do Bryan and Alex look a lot alike? Alex is sweating profusely. Eric seems like a guy that will get pissy when he finally doesn't get a rose. Matt! That's it. You can tell Peter's still a little annoyed at how Rachel used him the other day so he takes the rose grudgingly. Wouldn't it be weird if the remaining black guys without a rose prior to the ceremony went home? HOW IS ADAM STILL ON THIS SHOW????? DITTO FOR MATT???? Wow, I was kidding about sending the black guys home. Josiah is pissed and Anthony doesn't really seem..anything. Josiah--maybe nobody said it to you face but you are a legend in your own mind only. I'm not disagreeing with his opinion of the other guys but she said you never asked her about herself. And that didn't resonate with you. Why am I even wasting my time with this? Yes, J, Alex definitely has many things over you, all previously cited. That doll is so creepy and yet so funny. Everybody looks awkward and subdued post ceremony.
The gang moves from Oslo to Copenhagen
Rach is ready to get serious with these guys. All of the guys are drinking some sort of swill-looking beer except for Alex who is either drinking coffee grounds or a stout. Could go either way. I'm sure the hotel is nicer when it doesn't look so freaking cold out.
Eric gets the one-on-one and Matt of all people looks annoyed. He should just be counting his blessings he's still around at this point. Talk about flying under the radar.
One-on-One
We'll see how Eric does. We know he's a little insecure but now that Josiah's gone somebody needs to fill the "I'm insecure but I'm going to overcompensate by acting overconfident" role. How many false eyelashes do you think Rachel has gone through at this point? It must be exhausting to wear them all the time and not just at night. They do seem to be having a good time. Despite the fact that "stumble" across a hot tub and Rachel "didn't know you could do this in Copenhagen", they both just happen to either be already wearing their bathing suits or have them packed in their jackets. Do you think it's a requirement to wear your bathing suit at all times because you never know when a hot tub is going to be put in your path and the contracts require you to sample each hot tub you come across? And of course there's a drunk naked guy.
Back at the House
Both Matt and Adam are yearning for a one-on-one date card when again, they should just be thankful they haven't been sent home. Because as they say in Pat the Bunny, "hear the tick-tick bunny?"
 |
| Time is running out for Adam and Matt. |
Your days are numbered, boys. Peter is sly and lets Dean think he's getting a one-on-one and then starts reading more names.
One-on-one
Eric starts sharing his back story and the skeletons come out. Similar to a woman who has no relationship with her dad and develops a daddy complex, he has a mommy complex. He blames his mom for his commitment issues because she never loved him. But he claims his feelings for Rachel are different. Of course they are. These are red flags, Rachel. Sorry Eric, it doesn't top Dean's story of his dead mom. If the Bachelorette is the best experience of your life then you need to get out more. Rachel doesn't seem alarmed by any of this. When he's not acting insecure I do like Eric. Copenhagen doesn't have country bands looking for publicity at the disposal so instead of taking the date in that direction they go back to the amusement park.
Group Date
I am very skeptical about this Viking date because Iceland has the best Viking museum there ever was. And I realize that they're not going to a museum but it drove home the point that Denmark can't beat Iceland's Viking history. But I guess it's not really about history, is it? And yet Tom and Morton, the Viking Fighting Instructors, further prove that they were either randomly pulled aside and paid to pretend to be Viking "Instructors", or they've been hitting something prior to this whole charade.
Kenny is taking this very seriously but the other guys look confused. Oh wait, Alex is into it too. You can tell Peter is still pissed by not getting the rose last week despite his make-out session. He still feels used. Could he be the Claire of this season? These games are ridiculous. I'm pretty sure of two things:
- None of these games were played in Viking times.
- These two guys are making this up as they go along.
Wow, Dean has clearly had time to sneak in a whitening treatment in the last few days because his teeth are glowing again. Alex is going all in because he has nothing to lose at this point. Alex and Kenny have some final showdown and while my money's on Alex, Kenny prevails as he probably should since he's a professional wrestler.
While I think Bryan is the front-runner in this competition, I am tiring of their conversations. In theory, she'll have the issue of moving with any of the guys, yet she doesn't seem to bring up the topic of moving with anybody else. Which may be the point because she's starting to think it through with him but not with the other guys. While I'm not a fan of their noisy kissing, we have no reason to think that Bryan isn't anything but what he says he is, except, of course, for the hidden rage around chiropractors not being real doctors.
We find out back at the house that Will doesn't typically date black girls, which brings up the obvious question of how a hometown date would go.
Peter and Rach have their first conversation since their make out session. She tries to make up for using him last week by making out with him more. Kenny and Matt talk about Kenny being away from his daughter and Matt nods and pretends to understand what he's talking about even though he has no idea.
Matt throws Kenny under the bus and tells Rachel that Kenny's struggling. Kenny might be the first parent on this series in recent history that actually seems to miss his child. There have been other guys on this show that mention their kids in passing but clearly seem indifferent to their existence. And "devoted mom" Amanda seems to do fine when she shows up on BIP every summer. MEOW! And yes, I think I just mommy shamed her. But you know what? I own it.
Kenny shares his ongoing struggles with Rachel. They seem to be on the same page where their relationship is at and Rachel finally does the right thing and tells Kenny he should go home. And Rachel acknowledges exactly what I said above and said it would be super-weird if he was never talking about Mackenzie. They part ways amicably.
The guys are of course excited that one more guy was sent home. I have no idea who Rach is giving the rose to, mainly because its taken me three days to get through this episode. Maybe she'll throw a bone to Adam and Matt? Maybe she'll make up for using Peter last week? It IS Peter! He's sooooo happy and Bryan is pissed.
One-on-One with Will
I had completely forgotten there was still another date happening. I'm not sure Will's going to get the rose tonight but let's see how things go. They seem to be on a ferry all by themselves. They're eating their way through Sweden (which sounds way more judgy (judgey?) than intended because those pastries look delicious) and a random couple sits with them in a cafe. The producers must have been polling people in the cafe asking who is married and for how long. They found this couple who've been together 35 years and told them to go sit with Rachel and Will. I'm not entirely convinced they're a real couple.
If anything, Rachel needs to send Will home rose based on his incorrect and constant use of the word literally. She's disappointed that he's not trying to jump her bones. It does look super awkward. In his defense, we know he prefers white girls.
Will, of course, seems to think the day has been going well. Rachel and Will talk about growing up with money and not having a lot of black people around. Rachel seemed to address this by making an effort to meet and hang out with other black people and Will didn't.
Back at the house
Back at the house the guys talk about Will and how he hasn't typically dated black women. Eric said he told Will that he should tell Rachel that. Dean is confused and isn't sure why that's relevant because he's never really dated a black woman before either. Eric spells it slowly for Dean that the difference is Will is black. Dean seems confused by this. Peter wonders if Will's even attracted to black women. If only Will acted more "black"!
Back at the Date
Wow, this getting painful to watch. Will claims to be a very passionate and affectionate person but is trying to change that. I guess that means he's attempting to be interested in women as people and not just objects? He talks about falling in love last year and how nice it was and he wants that again. Rachel asks what it was about her. Will doesn't say it but obviously it was because the girl was white.
There must be a clause in the contract that the Bachelor/Bachelorette has to pick up the rose even if s/he isn't going to give it out. Of course Will doesn't get the rose. He takes the news well and wonders to himself if he'll be able to go on BIP so he can finally meet a white girl.
Rose Ceremony
Adam is sufficiently concerned that he's going home. Alex is in black with a lavender tie. Or maybe it's more pink. Chris greets Rachel and makes the astute observation that Rachel seems solemn. Oh Chris, I think you're getting colder. He's not particularly interested in Rachel's response and wishes her luck. Perhaps he's pissed that they've spent quite a bit of time between Nick and Rachel's seasons in much colder locales?
Rachel starts quoting Hamlet and the guys look lost. Is she actually going to keep Alex and Matt? Because they've had zero screen time, yet she's super emotional at the idea of someone getting cut. Could she be cutting Dean or Alex? Please don't cut Alex yet. Matt gets the second rose? I'm so confused. WHAT????????????????? Alex is going home? Alex is sooooo hot. Now there are no more snappy dressers. Please let Alex end up on BIP? Rachel has stronger feelings for Matt and Adam than Alex? I didn't see this coming. Did you?
Credits
We see a montage of how Dean is apparently the worst Viking ever. Alex: If we were playing "pretty little princess? Yeah, he would kill the game." How could Rachel let that man go?
No comments:
Post a Comment